Tears
It’s been five years
ago when I started to live alone with no one beside me. Whenever I woke up in
the morning, everything seems so lame for me. Every street that I encounter
seems to have an affray. Every conspicuous thing seems annoying
for me. When I go to my work, I always find the people talking about piffle things
even though it’s not. When someone talks
to me, I always feel that I am coy to answer. I am a very taciturn
person and I don’t want to talk to anybody else for five years except to the
customers and staffs of the Café where I work.
All I can say is, I’m always irritated to every single creature here on
earth. Why? Let me tell you my story.
It happened five years
ago, March 28, 2007, the vacuous day of my life where everything thing
seems to be empty. Yes I know my life became empty since that day.
It is our graduation
day I will be graduating as a cum laude in our university. I called my parents
because it’s only 10 minutes before the ceremony start but they’re not
answering me. During that moment, I felt that they are fainéant about my
graduation. They did not even attend the baccalaureate mass because they
said that they had an important rendezvous and I just been alone during
that moment. (Fine, I always know that.
They don’t care about me and they just spend their times in the company without
thinking about me. How am I doing? How are my studies? Did I ate my favorite parfait
or what). After a few minutes, the ceremony started. I heard the vociferate sound of the
graduation march, as we began the graduation march, I can see the other
students with their parents or persons that are consanguineous to them.
They are so happy. How about me? There alone. Tears began to fell down from my
eyes which is superfluous for me
because I don’t usually cry but during the moment, I can’t even resuscitate my
happy thoughts last night. I became a hag during that time because I
lost my make-up and I was not able to wipe my tears. I became angry to my
parents and I even removed the babushka that my mother gave to me. When
the Professor called my name, I stood up with tears. I received the award that
I got for the past 4 years that I studied in the university. My heart and mind
was covered with a very strong angriness to my parents and I felt that I became
contumacious. While I was on stage in front of many people, the small chandelier
on the ceiling at the side of the stage fell down. My heart beat became
faster and I just heard my cell phone ringing. I answered the phone call and it
was from my uncle. He said that they are in the hospital because my parents who
are going to my graduation ceremony had an accident and they are in the
critical level. After hearing that phone
call, all of the things that I felt for my parents for not attending the
ceremony disappeared. I ran away without any hesitation. When I came to the
hospital, all of our relatives that are there are crying. I walk slowly to the
emergency room with my swollen eyes from tears. I found my parents dead. My
uncle talked I was so sorry for all of my thoughts about them. My uncle talked
to me and he said that my parents are so excited to go to my graduation and
they are really proud of me and they felt sorry because they we’re not able to
attend the baccalaureate mass. Until the police called my uncle and said that
my parents had a car accident.
I felt so guilty about
the rambunctious attitude that I showed them when they are still alive.
I was not able to show my love to them. I felt so crazy that’s why I left our
house and live independently but then now I realized that they are in appease
and I should comeback and manage all of
things that my parents left to the company and to appreciate their hard
works.
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